Cold Bloodedness

So once upon a time in India I was on a Youth Expedition Project(charity work cum self-discovery thing sponsored by the Singapore government) and a friend of mine, my angel(honourific for some game we played), told me(or rather everyone else there) that I was possibly the most cold-blooded person he had known. And that he thought I was very likely to kill someone whilst proclaiming in a calm and emotionless voice that it wasn't personal, sorry.

He's right, of course.

That's when it comes to work, though. I know I can be a bitch when it comes to doing stuff ordained by the powers that be - meaning my boss. It comes from having had to do too much admin work - somehow it's easier to fuck the person whose pleading clemency than to challenge the well-established rules that you've been following.

And then there's precedence, of course. Ellyn explained it very clearly to me, with some examples, of how it's never a good idea to be kind to one person only to have the law come crashing down becauese then everyone else will expect to be judged on the same terms.

And if you could have a day off just because your grandmother died, then... a lot of grandmothers would die.

In any case, I do not deny that I am quite the cold-hearted beast when it comes to work. I've done the standard receptionist's 'Oh, I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do for you..." when I knew full well there was bloody lots I could have done and with a few simple clicks of the mouse, too.

But... what about friendships?

I don't know. I suppose it's a matter of opinion. I do try to be nice and all, but when it has to be a conscious effort I don't suppose it is a good thing. To my credit, I don't think I've ever really hurt anyone very badly before, not to the point where they have bawled all over me and all, so I can't be that evil. But then again my friends have a tendency to be on the less emotional side, so I suppose it's a biased observation.

But really - to be cold-blooded... isn't it also part of the position of coolness(I refer more to the definition from cool-headed and calm than anything else)? Aren't cool people also cold-blooded? Of course, if you ignore the positive/negative connotations of the terms used, you'll see they're actually both sides of the same coin. Thankfully, I can proudly say I have never been cool in front of my friends. I've been cranky, crazy and cooky, but never cool.

So I guess I'm not that cold-blooded after all.

Mind you, though, I'd still kill you in a second if my boss ordered it. And if you were quite weak and easy-to-kill. Otherwise it might take a few weeks of planning and poisoning.

Speaking of cold-bloodedness, I found this article about the recent tsunami being the handiwork of a christian God against the persecution of his covenent. Of course crazy idiots who make claims like that aren't uncommon, but look at this quote from a more "reasonable" voice. Todd Johnson, director of the Centre for the Study of Global Christianity at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary says of the fact that the regions worst hit by the tsunami were those that had exhibited extreme persecution of Christians - "It just doesn't make quantitative sense in that respect," and "It's hard for me to believe that these folks (in South Asia) were the most sinful people in the world," because, evidently... there are worse places! Yes, folks, there are sinners elsewhere who deserve to be killed by that tsunami that weren't.

Pity, that. All those homosexuals, pagan-worshippers, hedonists, drug-takers and more importantly, MUSLIMS were spared! Where's the divine justice?

Sometimes I'm happy I'm not christian. The logic of faith just doesn't stick.